Friday, July 31, 2009

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Invisible

Transparent aluminium is 'new state of matter'
July 27th, 2009
Experimental set-up at the FLASH laser used to discover the new state of matter.

Oxford scientists have created a transparent form of aluminium by bombarding the metal with the world’s most powerful soft X-ray laser. 'Transparent aluminium' previously only existed in science fiction, featuring in the movie Star Trek IV, but the real material is an exotic new state of matter with implications for planetary science and nuclear fusion.

In this week’s Nature Physics an international team, led by Oxford University scientists, report that a short pulse from the FLASH laser ‘knocked out’ a core electron from every aluminium atom in a sample without disrupting the metal’s crystalline structure. This turned the aluminium nearly invisible to extreme ultraviolet radiation.

Tatas

Caralyn Hall
Cindy Barnett

Carrot Top: The real threat to mankind?

First you have a celebrated patriot Ollie North selling guns to the contras. Nicaragua is big bucks and very unstable. The money delivered for the guns comes from drugs that the CIA help smuggle and sell in the states. The drugs are mostly designer drugs and steroids. This helps to keep leftist Hollywood skinny and devoid of a conscience. They keep the chubs fat and happy. A sedated community is easily led. Those steroids are used to turn Carrot Top from a hilarious comic into an upper fueled goliath. Hell bent on world domination and unable to control his violent comic outbursts. Carrot Top is used to hug guerilla soldiers and rebels to death in order to keep the dictatorship of the 3rd world in power. No one wants to challenge a prop comic on a bender. It is a vicious circle my friends and I am happy to explain it to you. Carrot Top: More dangerous than you think.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Gone Native

Enough wine and song and I believe I have gone native. I drifted off the straight and narrow and I may not come back. Where is the spam, pineapple and mixed drinks?
Rum has saturated through me and all that I want to do is hit the water and sand. Watch out loin cloth, here I come.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Drinks


Bike

Still looking. No luck, but still looking.




Thursday, July 23, 2009

Counting Cards

Collinson Twins

Roadracers


I need to watch Roadracers again. A campy Robert Rodriguez film that has an awesome soundtrack. " Rock and roll has made those kids road racin', beer drinking, sex crazed werewolves."

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Hey yo


keep it combed

Keep it combed. Don't want to look like a dirty hippy.

The virginias

Virginia Felsem
Virginia Bell

Monday, July 20, 2009

Charles Nelson Reilly


I need a Charles Nelson Reilly portrait on velvet and some Match Game 76' re-runs and I am set for an evening. Seriously, watch Match Game. Everybody is pilled up and drunk and Richard Dawson is trying to lay down some pipe with every female in the room. I am not even sure if you get anything for winning. Maybe some ca-kaine and a STD.

Blog?

The bottle let me down. I realized that I'm horrible at composition and spell check after a cocktail or three. Don't let your friends drink and blog. I guess proof-reading needs to be done when you are sober and alert. It sounded good in my head.

Hotrods to Hell

White Trailer Trash

White Trailer Trash
Drink Type: Cocktail

1 oz. 7-Up
1/2 oz. Peach Schnapps
1/2 oz. Southern Comfort
Instructions
Serve over ice in a cocktail glass. Garnish with a slice of lemon.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Strange

What is northeast of Vegas? You tell me. Maybe we aren't supposed to know.

I was told once by a guy that it wasn't very interesting. Hmm.. Sure.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Kartin'

Hitting the kart racin' circuit pretty hard today. Kartin', it's a lifestyle. You wouldn't know. You probably aren't invited. You can't become a Kartin' man. You are born with a need to race 50cc engines in tiny little frames. The thrill of the po po trying to catch you knocking back a tastey beverage in the parking lot. I didn't know their would be a problem with adults get sauced up at a children's amusement center. Management trying to stop me from rubbin' too hard. You can't stop a man with a need for speed. Although, he can apply the remote brakes and shut you down. You can't tame me. You can just stop my tiny car with your science.
Who will win? Who cares. Will Joe-nathan get the tarded kart yet again? My guess is yes. Til next time, Gone Kartin'!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

The Crazy Redneck

Cocktail of the day: The Crazy Redneck
Ingredients to use: 6.0 oz Mountain Dew Lemon Lime Soda
1.5 oz Vodka
Directions: Fill a highball glass (or a stripes cup) with ice. Add vodka, fill with Mountain Dew (get real country and go for the mountain lightening), and stir.

David Allan Coe- Tattoo 1977


Nudie Suit



I dig 'em. Who would think rhinestones would look so tough.

Hola

Be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life.
Revelation, 2. 10

What's the haps?

I have been slaving at the easel more and more lately. Frustrating and sweaty. I need a relaxing hobby. My dog is covered in gold flakes. My hands are stained purple and green. Here are the fruits of my labor (in progress). Check out the space for the pics.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Hay Yo!




for my next shindig!

ELVIS PARTY MIX
1 pound banana chips
1 box capt crunch peanut butter crunch
1 large wooden tiki carved salad serving ware (preferably wooden carved with tiki idols)
Pour 1 lb of banana chips into large serving bowl. Add 1 box peanut butter crunch. Stir
with large salad serving fork and spoon. Serve (best eaten by hand).
Optional: Add one pound of dried pineapple chips for a greater luau effect.

Call me fat and happy. Any recipe with peanut butter crunch is awesome.

Bingo

Dancing ladies, terrible songs and effeminate bikers. Beach Blanket Bingo. All I remember is lady parts dancing in bikini's, sky diving and hi-jinx.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Rock-a- wha?

Rockabilly: Why?
I guess if it makes people mad, then you must be doing something right. It seems like a novelty to slick your hair back and cuff your jeans. I remember you had to cuff your pant legs because you had to get them too long so they would last through the growth spurts. I wasn't poor poor growing up, but everything I got was from K-mart and was put on lay-away. I once go parachute pants on lay-away. Finally got them home and I wore them to the roller disco. The zippers violently cut the shit out of me during a game of red light green light played while listening to the Fat Boys' "Wipeout". Ok, off track. Everybody in my family had a greasy head at one time or for entire life, my Grandpa. He kept it slicked back and tapered for over 90 years. My dad gave up slicking his hair back in the 70 and 80's when he eventually got a man perm. Sweet man perm. Then he had the ponytail and beard. Now it is back to combing it straight back. Although it gets poofy and huge. I call Hallelujah hair or "The Evangelist". I just like things this way. I like staining pillows and couches. I like barber shops. A hair stylist is for those who want a cut and color. Maybe a male brazillian. Man up and find a barber.

I had forgotten how much I actually liked some of these songs. Something about a crazy hillbilly screaming that makes me want to listen more. I have always had a soft spot for drunks and eccentrics. Johnny Burnette yelling like a lunatic during recordings. Everybody is expected to be prim and proper like Pat Boone and Johnny is shrieking in middle of the song.

You ever tried to play an acoustic instrument and make it seems rockin' and fuckin' raw. That is why everybody tried to pick those same instruments up in the 60's and all that you get is the Chad Mitchell Trio or The Mamas and the Papas. In the 70's you get James Taylor. Train kept a rolling, Rockabilly Boogie. I wonder what you'd be missing without these recordings. If Muddy Waters didn't exist you would never have gotten the Rolling Stones. If Chuck Berry wasn't around you wouldn't have that lame scene in Back to The Future of Micheal J Fox doing the duck walk.

I learned to ignore the Grease jokes through the years. I avoid penny loafers. Some of it is stereotypical. Mostly because they plaster Elvis on everything. Every genre has stereotypes. I really fuckin' hate Grease. Musicals are shitty enough, but that one tried to ruin sideburns like Hitler did with tiny moustaches. I like sideburns because they seem to really bug people. The bigger or pointier the more shit you end up getting.

Every song is about drinking, fighting, sex or cars. I take that back. I just listened to "Black Slacks". Why is the Jetsons car featured in the song. Derby hat, red bow tie, suspenders, chain down to your knees and page 14 black slacks. I am not sure where Joe Bennett is going with that song. I guess slacks are cool? When you try in vain to write a Blue Seude Shoes. Like country or blues it is for blue collar by blue collar. Just more up-beat. You listen to honky tonk all day you are just going to end up depressed and drinking. Waltzing the floor over you, Your cheating heart. Leadbelly singing In the Pines. Sometimes you need it a little motivation. I can't be dark all the time. I won't start in on sock hop and the fat guy in the car shirt that loves American Graffiti. If they are happy let 'em be. I do hate the 57 chevy print button-up.
I am influenced but do not consider myself in a scene. I don't do much to feel like I belong. Jr High is spent trying to belong. High School is spent trying to rebel. After 30 I just want to be whoever I want to be that day. Similar clothes and hairstyles happen you hang around people with the same interests and hobbies. Slicked hair, jeans, boots, band shirts and wallet chains. People you like to hang around with or think are interesting will influence you. And the stereotype is born. Similarities and imitation should be seen as flattery. Most still worry about being unique. Who cares. Just do what you want. I would do sock-hop if the mood struck me. Except for the fact I would look like a fat "Stray Cat" in pleated slacks and a pink bowling shirt.

May your hair stand high and stay put, even in the South Texas humidity.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Mahi Mahi

So I baked some Mahi Mahi and it was good, but what do I do for a sauce or glaze? I feel as if I am missing something. Eating healthy is a must again to avoid the expansion of old age. Tomorrow is the adventures of homegrown jalapeno queche. It is not for the love of new things but the quest for things that just taste really good.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Tired part 1

I am so tired. I don't sleep at night. I get this way. The nights make me anxious. Quiet, black and mind wandering. I can't wrap my tiny little brain around it. I am tormented by dreams of uncertainty. I can't make a decision. I can't get any motivation going, like pushing a car through a snow drift. Feet slipping and hands throbbing in prickly ice covered pain. Maybe I am not as medicated as the rest of the slack jaws. Not as dull.

Maybe it is the allergies. I am not sure what. I guess it is the dry unrelenting weather. All the dust floating on by. No water and baked earth makes for a clay oven. An oven that has no off knob. Turn it off.


Maybe mixed drinks and sleep can turn it off. I guess I can give it the ol' college try. make a go of it. Then I get disgusted. Why? All the Michael Jackson idolatry I can stand. No news but an asexual mess who took too many pills. God rest his soul. Why a golden casket? A few hundred thousand that could have been put to a better use. Nope. Let's waste the cash on a box that will get buried in the ground.

Do you think their are really aliens? Do they think we are a bunch of primitive fuck-wads hopped up on Prozac watching chubby people dance.

Lady Lumps

Equal Opportunity
Milena Velba
Good ol big ones and big old good ones.



Make something of yourself: take off yur top

The lingerie edition